therapy's dirty little secret

I might ruffle a few feathers, but we gotta address a major problem in the therapy world:

Client dependence.

Before we get into it, I want to clarify that I like traditional therapy. I no longer use it in practice with clients, but I do utilize it personally.

But… that wasn’t always the case.

Years ago, I believed I was doing ALL the right things:

• Taking responsibility for my own growth

• Facing my challenges with hope for healing

• Using therapy as a space to address blind spots

But, once I started practicing therapy as a therapist, I witnessed its dirty little secret.

Hard-working academics and professionals have done their best to mitigate the issue through education and ethics, but it misses the mark:

Most therapists only learn through experience and unfortunately many won’t.

Here’s the issue:

Many therapists get into the field because they are/were wounded themselves and get an emotional payout from being needed.

They don’t intentionally use the power differential to harm their clients, but they may unconsciously reinforce their clients' “need” for therapy.

It’s not about financial gain or keeping clients around for profit (although that can happen)—it’s that they receive an emotional payout from maintaining the dynamic.

Many therapists are Wounded Healers seeking safety and validation WITHIN their role as therapists.

It feels good to be the one with “all the answers,” and when clients assert their own sovereignty, it can feel threatening to the therapist's sense of identity and purpose.

If therapists haven’t done their own deep emotional work, this dynamic can easily unfold.

Anyway, why is this important?

Right, because I quit therapy after my first Somatic Release.

Part of the “Psycho-Emotional Download” that occurred simultaneously with my release was the realization that I was overly dependent on my therapist.

We had created a dynamic that ultimately was not helpful.

What a hard pill to swallow…

But, I never would have experienced this without the Psycho-Emotional Download.

When your BodyMind releases survival stress and past trauma, it creates a lot of “empty space” for your subconscious to fill.

Think of your nervous system as a container.

We want it to be strong and flexible, capable of holding all of life’s challenges.

But we also need to empty that container when necessary. We want to free it from unwanted stress so it can make room for new energy.

So, I had my first Somatic Release and realized, holy sh!t:

“I need to fire my therapist.”

I’ve always been a bit impulsive, but looking back, it’s reassuring to know I made the right decision.

Nothing has changed my life more than Somatic Psychology.

It’s taught me life’s most important lessons:

• How to be still

• How to face hard truths

• How to listen to my intuition

• How to process ugly emotions

And many more.

I stopped relying on someone else to guide my healing and started trusting my innate ability to find answers.

Was it painful? Absolutely. Worth it?

You bet…

If you’re in therapy and feeling stuck, I encourage you to reflect on this:

Are you being empowered to take charge of your healing, or are you dependent on someone else’s guidance?

The answer could change everything.

With love,
Brian Maierhofer (Professional Human)

P.S. Thanksgiving will mark the 1-year anniversary of my journey writing online!

I’ll be offering something cool for Black Friday/Cyber Monday to celebrate.

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